How to Rejoice When You Don't Want to

When life sucks, I have a hard time rejoicing.  But God wants believers to rejoice always (Philippians 4:4).

Always?

Surely God doesn't mean always.  Because that's impossible.

How can we be expected to rejoice when we're stuck in a job we hate?  Or when our kids are sick?  Or when our marriage is at an all-time low?  Or when the doctor tells us we are infertile?  Or when we don't know how we're going to pay the mortgage this month?

How can a reasonable God require us to rejoice in these kinds of circumstances?

I think the answer is He doesn't.

He never calls us to rejoice in circumstances at all.  He calls us to rejoice in Him, no matter what our circumstances look like.

I think this distinction is huge.  It directly affects how we view God.

Philippians 4:4 reads, "Rejoice in the Lord always."  

If we think God wants us to rejoice over the loss of a child or our recent divorce, then we'll see God as sadistic and unfeeling.

But if we think God wants us to rejoice in Him - His goodness and His unfailing love - while we're in the circumstances, then we'll see God as a compassionate Savior and a heroic Redeemer, offering us hope that we don't otherwise have.

Here's how that pans out in reality.

You've just moved to a new town where you have no friends or family to speak of.  You are far from home.  You feel isolated and depressed as you grieve the friendships you've left.  You're hating life right now, loathing each and every minute.  And the Lord says rejoice.  If we hear this as "rejoice in your situation", we'll say, "There is nothing good about this situation.  I am hurting!  Even if I try to think positively about all the Lord might have in store for me in my new surroundings, that doesn't make my present pain any less."  But, if we hear the command to rejoice as "rejoice in the Lord," we can say, "Lord, I hurt right now.  The end of this pain is nowhere in sight.  But I know that you love me, and I know you are in control.  Thank you for being so trustworthy, especially when life is difficult."

The difference is, when we are rejoicing in who the Lord is instead of what our circumstances are, we are free to feel our pain.  We can be honest about our emotions and don't have to feel guilty for not feeling joyful toward life.

Let's Be Honest...

There is a movement of sorts taking place in my generation.  We could call it the Cut the Crap campaign.  Or the We're Not Stupid initiative.  Or the Who Do You Think You're Kidding drive.  Whatever you want to call it, the idea is the same: we want blatant honesty.

We want transparency from our leaders, whether political, corporate or ecumenical.  We want people to give it to us straight, even if they think it will hurt us, disappoint us, or make our opinions of them plummet.  We want honesty no matter the cost.

There are people out there who would rather stick their heads in the sand than drag ugly situations into the light.  Like toddlers playing hide and seek, these people think closing their eyes makes problems disappear.  They spend their time trying to ignore hardships and fail to grow through their challenges.

There are other people out there who would rather paint a pretty picture than admit they don't have it all together.  They know they don't have it all together, but their pride keeps them from letting the rest of us know they don't have it all together.  They spend their time trying to hide difficulties and fail to heal from their pain.

Then there is a third group of people.  They admit they have problems.  They share those problems with others.  Their honesty begets honesty, and they find their friends start sharing about their problems.  They learn from one another.  They see God work in each others lives.  They become encouraged that He really does care.  They worship the Lord who delivers them from hardship together.  And they share His hope with others who have dared to admit that they are struggling.

These people grow. 

And something amazing happens...the hope and love of Jesus Christ spread like wild fire. 

I can't help but think that is what Church was always meant to be.  People hurting together, inviting honesty, speaking truth from the Scriptures while they are hurting together, not pretending that life doesn't hurt, praying for one another, seeing God answer those prayers, rejoicing together, praising God for who He is and what He has done in their lives, and sharing that testimony with others.  As near as I can tell, this description incorporates Bible study, prayer, worship and evangelism.

And it does it while being honest. 

How can we make our churches more like this?

I think it starts with me and you getting real with those around us.   That's risky, for sure, but the potential for richness of community with others and deeper intimacy in our relationships with God are worth that risk. 

We are the Church.  If we want the Church to be more transparent, let's be honest.