Daily Dose of Grace

I hope you never get tired of hearing about grace.  I guess if you did you would've stopped coming here a long time ago.

A writer I enjoy, Jon Acuff, wrote about grace today, and he marveled at the idea that a holy God is also a God of second chances.  Actually, this side of death, He is a God of innumerable chances.  Whether we believe in God or not, every single day God gives us chances to choose Him.  But that isn't even the most amazing part.  

The mind-blowing part is that God gives us chances to choose Him even though we've NOT chosen Him COUNTLESS times before.

Who does that?!  Who in their right mind offers that kind of grace?  Even the "best" people tire of turning the other cheek.  Even the most loving people retreat from hurtful relationships after being taken advantage of umpteen times.  Even the most Christlike people give up on those who neglect them for too long.

Surely the God of the universe, perfect in every way, has the right to rescind His offer of unconditional love and His promise of Heaven if we show Him we don't want Him one too many times.  

Make no mistake, He DOES have every right to do that...

But He chooses not to...

He chooses to give us another chance to know Him and experience His unfailing love TODAY, no matter how we've rejected Him in the past.  And, if we wake up tomorrow, He'll give us another chance then, too...

Why?

Because He loves us. (Jeremiah 31:3; Zephaniah 3:17)

That's it.  It is no more complicated than that. 

 

God wants to give YOU grace. 

GOD wants to give you grace.

God WANTS to give you grace.

God wants to GIVE you grace.

God wants to give you GRACE!

Free Samples of Grace and Mercy

I've heard a lot of people say that the reason you should forgive someone who has hurt you is so you won't be weighed down by holding a grudge.  It doesn't matter if the other person is sorry or if he is even aware that he has something to be sorry for.  It's not about the other person; it's about your finding freedom from the pain.

And that might be true. But what if forgiveness is about something bigger than that?

A lot of times the person who has been hurt thinks that forgiveness is theirs to give.  We act like we have grace and mercy stored up within us, and, when we deem someone worthy, we can offer them forgiveness out of the goodness of our hearts.

That sounds noble.  But it's not.  It's a self-centered lie that cheapens the act of forgiveness.

The truth is we are no better than the person who hurt us.  We are all guilty of hurting others from time to time.  The other truth is grace and mercy are never ours to give.  We can't produce them.  They are unnatural.  We can force ourselves to play nice, but we know, in the depths of our hearts, we still despise them for what they did.

Jesus is the source of all mercy and grace (Jhn 1:17) .  And when we experience His forgiveness personally, it inspires us to show the same grace to others (as opposed to giving a counterfeit version of man made grace, complete with strings attached) .

When others hurt us, we should think, "Let me show you the Lord's grace in our situation because His grace is so fantastic I can't contain myself! I want everyone to experience it!"  We share the grace and mercy we have been the recipients of because we are keenly aware of just how much we ourselves have been forgiven.

We are grace peddlers, if you will, giving out free samples of grace and mercy when others offend us.  Hopefully, they will find the samples so delicious that all they can think about is getting more.  They'll realize they've never experienced anything so delightful, and they'll begin to crave grace and mercy in larger quantities.

They'll have to go to the Maker; we peddlers only carry around a limited supply.  And that is the bigger point of forgiveness.  When we are willing to forgive, sharing a taste of Christ's mercy and grace with others, the experience draws them (and us) to the Father.

Calculating Grace (and Finding it Doesn't Add Up)

In case you aren't a details person, I changed the name of the blog.  It's been 2.5 years since I started this gig, so it was time for a face lift.  "Observations of the Ordinary" was a blog I started to have a space to preserve and share the funny, interesting, and otherwise noteworthy experiences of raising a child.  My firstborn gave me plenty of material.  But I've found that when it comes to writing, my creative juices have shifted.

Now I am much more interested in writing about spiritual matters - what experiences I am having with God, observations of Christians and the Church, and what the Bible has to do with real life.  I have a desire to live a transparent life as a Christian so that those around me (whether they have similar or vastly different beliefs) can see how relational faith in God is not only possible but immeasurably more glorious than everything else in life.

With that shift of focus in mind, I've changed the name of the blog to "Calculating Grace". What does that mean?  It means I, like many Christians, spend far too much time trying to understand why God loves us and wants anything to do with us.  We know He does, via our own experiences and what the Bible teaches, but we often feel like we can't accept His love.  When we do the math, our sinfulness makes us feel unworthy of a Holy God's love.  When we try to calculate His grace, wanting to grasp how our sin + accepting Jesus' sacrifice = unlimited grace, we find it doesn't add up.  And that is precisely the beauty of it.

The Bible says, "⁴ But God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, ⁵ that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. (It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved!) ⁶ For he raised us from the dead along with Christ and seated us with him in the heavenly realms because we are united with Christ Jesus. ⁷ So God can point to us in all future ages as examples of the incredible wealth of his grace and kindness toward us, as shown in all he has done for us who are united with Christ Jesus.  ⁸ God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. ⁹ Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it."

Not one of us deserves God's love.  It can't be earned.  It doesn't make any sense that He would show us an ounce of kindness. We can try to calculate grace, but we will find it doesn't add up.

Thank God it doesn't have to.

Maturity

Sometimes I buy into the lie that because I have "issues" I am an immature believer. I start to think that my tendencies toward being self-centered and manipulative and foolish are because I don't know God well enough. And, once I start believing that is true, it's easy to buy into a bigger lie - the one that says if I work harder at my relationship with God, I won't have so many issues. The lie that says I can work through my issues, one by one, and come out the other side a shiny, sparkling, perfect Christian. And, once I believe that, grace goes out the window. I start trying to earn my way onto the list of superstar Christians.

But all I'm really doing is exhausting myself.

I think, instead, that our "issues" are a symptom of our fallen nature. And, last time I checked, we will be fallen our entire lives. Even if we are Christians, we sin frequently, and, sometimes, we sin severely. Therefore, we will have a never-ending list of issues to work on, and, unfortunately, after we think we've mastered some of our issues, we'll cross them off our list, only to find they've found their way back on the list as time goes on.

This realization may sound negative, but it's actually freeing. The fact that we will always have issues to work on means that the definition of spiritual maturity isn't issuelessness. A lot of people think that spiritual maturity is not having any issues to work on in the first place, but that cannot be. If that were the case, not one of us would be considered spiritually mature by another. (And if we considered ourselves to be spiritually mature by that definition, we'd have to add hubris to our list of issues to work on).

So, if issuelessness isn't the definition of spiritual maturity, how do we define it? My opinion is that those who are correctly labeled "spiritually mature" recognize the things in their lives that aren't pleasing to the Lord and then willingly go through the unpleasant process of changing those things. I think that willingness to press on is the mark of spiritual maturity. It shows a willingness, in the midst of our own ugliness, to trust that God is sovereign and good; that He can and will help us become better people for His sake and for our sakes.

As the Holy Spirit helps us see our issues for what they really are (sin), the mature Christian will face that gentle command to change head on, knowing full-well that the growth process will be painful, but knowing equally well that the resulting freedom will be worth it!

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Black or White

I've been trying tremendously hard lately to get my ducks in a row. I am a black and white person, so I like rules and order. If there is a rule, I can follow it. I can know that I am acting and thinking correctly. If rules don't exist, I feel out of control and begin to hyperventilate, metaphorically speaking, of course.

Even now, as I sit in a coffee shop typing this, I see a sticker on my mouse cord that says "DO NOT REMOVE THIS LABEL". My first thought was one of total compliance - under no circumstances will I remove that label. The rule is to leave that label exactly where it is, and I know I will be in the right if I leave that label alone. But then I thought, "How silly! I am an adult and the owner of that mouse. I think I have the authority to remove that label if I want to. The world will not end." But will I ever bring myself to remove that label? Absolutely not. I'm just not wired that way, I guess. And if someone else came along and took that label off, I would feel unsettled because THEY BROKE THE RULE!

This kind of thinking may be beneficial is some circumstances. I am glad that surgeons, for instance, follow the rules. If the doctor removing my kidney stones thought anesthesia shouldn't be required, I would've been in an intolerable amount of pain. And architects need to be black and white people, too. If my house was designed by a man that found no use for a level, I wouldn't be safe in my own home.

But, in other situations, black and white thinking can choke the life right out of you. Lately, I have fallen into the trap of trying to force God to be black and white in all ways. The only trouble is God exceeds human logic. Even if I correctly applied all my biblical training and philosophical know how, I would still be unable to define all that God is and all that God does. That's terrible news for a rule-follower like me.

To be clear, I am not saying it is impossible to know anything about God. I am saying it is impossible to know everything about God. We will never have an air-tight understanding of God. There will always be more to learn about Him, and our brains simply can't process all that He is. A lot of surprises await us in Heaven, when we will have slightly better understanding of God than we do now.

That being said, how can we deduce which of our beliefs about God are accurate and which have to be left open for interpretation? I think God gave us some things to help us answer this question. And, as a black and white thinker, I must answer this question!

Creation can tell us a lot about God's personality. Nature shows us He appreciates beauty and enjoys being creative. Biology shows us He thinks in complex ways and likes to design things systematically. Man shows us He values relationships and community. Creation points us to truths about God.

The Bible reveals more of God to us. Prophecies and the fulfillment of prophecies show how much of a planner God is and how He drives history for His purposes. Interactions between men and God show how involved in our lives God is and how much he desires to relate with us. Jesus' death and resurrection show us how seriously offensive our sin is to God and how desperately God wants to reconcile with us. Statements looking forward to Jesus' return and describing Heaven show us that God's plan for us and the world is not over.

These are things we can know for sure about God. And they are enough for us to know how to live our lives in a way that pleases Him. There are a lot of other things that are true about God, too, but we will wear ourselves out if we try to nail down every detail. I'd love to have a list of every single thing I must believe to have a correct picture of God. But God didn't feel that was necessary. Instead, He provided us with a framework and fills in the gaps of our understanding with His grace.

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The Gift of Giving Grace

I was having coffee with a friend the other day, and a thought occurred to me: without God's grace, I am unable to show grace to others.

What I mean is that giving people second chances completely goes against my human nature. I am under the impression that extending grace is unwise - it just opens me up to the possibility that the offender might hurt me again. And that's a pretty safe bet, given that none of my friends or family members are perfect.

But Jesus wants us to not only give second chances, but third and fourth and seventy seventh chances as well.

Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, "Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother when he sins against me? Up to seven times?" Jesus answered, "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy-seven times.

Matthew 18:21-22

But we are completely unable to muster up this kind of grace-giving ability ourselves. This type of forgiving spirit is supernatural. It is only when God graciously gives us the ability to show grace to others that we become genuine, Biblical forgivers.

And make no mistake about it - the ability to truly forgive is a gift. Just think about someone you know who lives a bitter existence. I am willing to bet it is because someone hurt them, and they are not willing to forgive the culprit. That's where God steps in and gives them a gift that can remove all the bitterness that's consuming them. He gives them the ability to extend grace.

It is then up to the offended to decide what to do with that gift. They can either accept it and pay grace forward, or they can refuse the gift and remain bitter and hurt.

What are you doing with the gift?
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His Grace is Sufficient

I am hanging out in the pediatric wing of Baptist Memorial Hospital. I'm here with Allie, my 8 month old. She had a fever with a mean cough and runny nose for a couple of days. Then the cough turned into a wheezing, and it was clear she was having trouble catching her breath. So I took her to the pediatrician, pretty much expecting him to tell me it was just a bad cold. He didn't.

After listening to her lungs, doing a complete blood count, and measuring oxygen levels before and after an Albuteral treatment, the doctor said she had bronchiolitis. Basically, the lining of her airways were swollen, making it harder for her to breathe. This was caused by a nasty cold virus called (RSV). The virus also caused her airways to become infected, resulting in pneumonia. She had a ton of mucus in her chest, and because she is so little, she doesn't have the muscle power to cough that crud up. So her little swollen lungs filled with mucus.

Our pediatrician calmly told me to drive Allie directly to the hospital. Oddly, I never experienced any anxiety. I was not worried at all. Don't get me wrong, I was concerned. I just wasn't emotional about it. I felt like I was being sent on an adventure.

When we got to the ER, the receptionist pulled up the order from our pediatrician. As he read it, his eyes got big, and he said, "Oh, they are going to call her right back." I thought, "Wow, he must think she's in pretty bad shape," but I never got overly excited about it. And when the ER doctor told us we were definitely being admitted, I didn't panic. When I saw my baby wearing oxygen, an IV, a heart monitor, and an oxygen monitor, I wasn't overwhelmed with sadness.


When we made it through the first night, and the pediatrician checked her the next morning, and she said, optimistically, we would not be going home for 3 more days, I never felt scared.

I began to wonder if my lack of worrying meant I was a bad parent. I began to worry because I wasn't worried. I wasn't the mom who was constantly crying and too worried to sleep. And part of me felt like I should've been that worked up. But then a friend reminded me of a discussion our Sunday School class had two weeks ago.

We were talking about joy and how God wants us to be joyful in all circumstances. Our class batted around possible definitions for joy and wondered how one could be joyful in the midst of terrible circumstances, like when your infant is hospitalized with a severe illness. We decided that joy is an inner peace and confidence in God's goodness and His sovereignty, no matter what happens. One of my classmates wisely noted that we can't imagine ourselves having the capability of being joyful when the worst is happening to us. It's not until we are actually in the tragic situation that God, through His sufficient grace, offers us the ability to choose joy. Make no mistake, it's a choice. God doesn't force joy into our hearts. But He offers us the truth that He is both good and sovereign, completely in control of the situation. We can choose to believe God and be comforted, or we can choose to not believe God and be anxious.

Maybe my sense of peace throughout Allie's hospitalization was because I trusted God with my child's health. I'd like to think so. It's either that, or I am emotionally deranged. You be the judge.


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Communion

My church got a new pastor 3 or 4 years ago, and, along with an updated wardrobe, Pastor Ernie Frey brought with him a desire to help people truly understand what Christ has to do with them. I have to say Ernie does this exceptionally well during our Communion services (which we have quarterly). Every time we have Communion, Ernie, via the Spirit, is able to bring us back to why we engage in this ritual. We aren't doing it for ritual's sake. We aren't doing it to earn points with God. We do it to remember how desperately we need Christ to be our Savior every single day, and to reflect on how He comes through for us like a knight in shining armor.

We took Communion yesterday. I'd been struggling all week with negative thinking about myself, about life in general, and about God. Upset with life circumstances, I've been basically telling God to take a hike for awhile so I can do what I want to do. And while I was pushing God away last week, blaming Him for my hurting heart, I knew what I was doing was wrong. It was wrong on a this-is-a-sin level, but it was wrong beyond that. When I am hurting, the only way to stop hurting is to go sit in the Father's lap and cry, letting him be the Comforter, and listening to the truth He wants to speak against the lies I've believed. But oftentimes when my heart hurts, I want to walk away from God because He caused/allowed the circumstances that are causing me pain. But walking away from God is walking away from relief. It is a logical inconsistency to turn away from the only One who can heal a broken heart when all you want is the pain to stop.

So, while I was pushing away God last week, knowing I was walking in the wrong direction, I became mad at myself for being such an idiot. My list of things I was mad at grew to include God, me, and the fact that life is just too hard most of the time. I was completely frustrated that despite being a Christ follower for almost 10 years, I am still as broken as I was in high school. I felt like I would never outgrow my self-destructive tendencies. Why would God even want to hang around a girl like that? I didn't even want to be with me last week - why would God, who deserves so much more praise, obedience, and love than I will ever be capable of giving him?

I carried all of this to church Sunday. And God met me there.

Via the Communion service, God said, "Yes, Kelly, you are that broken. You are bent toward hurting yourself and hurting others. And, although it grieves Me to watch you self-destruct, I love you. No matter how broken you are, I have more than enough grace to give you. Don't you get it? I will never run out of grace for you. You can't out do me; I will always have more grace than you have sin."

Romans 5:20-21 "Where sin increased, grace increased all the more...to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord."