I love it when you know God is telling you something. You know because the same message keeps popping up everywhere you go. I guess unbelievers would dismiss it as "coincidence", but believers know that nothing is ever a coincidence.
I am in a Bible study right now that is reading John & Stasi Eldridge's Captivating. It's all about what God created the female soul to be like, exposing the wounds that prevent each of us from fully embracing our feminine identity in Christ, and allowing the Lord to heal said wounds. I'll just tell you it is not a fun study. It is hard to consider all the ways your earthly father unknowingly (and knowingly, in some cases) hurt you as a little girl, all the ways your mom failed to model a Christlike woman for you, and all the ways others emotionally hurt you as you grew up. Because children don't have the life experience and proper perspective to understand why people act the way they do, children begin to assume bad things happen to them because of them. It is their fault. And Satan preys on this misunderstanding to get kids to believe other lies about themselves (they aren't smart/pretty/good enough, they are of no value, they don't deserve love, etc.). When kids grow up, these lies have become truth to them, and it deeply impacts the rest of their lives.
I am only in week 4 of the study. Up to now, all I've done is identify my specific wounds and the lies I've believed as a result of the wounds. This week we will begin to study how to let Christ come in and heal our hearts. And I have a feeling that will include deciding to conciously replace the lies with truth - the Truth - the Word of God.
Lo and behold, that's exactly what my Sunday School lesson was on today. We are exploring the idea that mind over matter really can work, and, beyond that, is necessary for living a Christlike life. It's another way of saying speaking truth to ourselves when we find ourselves believing a lie. For example, one thing most of us struggle with is feeling stuck in sin. No matter how hard we try to avoid a particular sin, we always fall back into it. We feel a hopelessness about ever "defeating" that sin. When we find ourselves depressed about this, we need to consciously decide to speak truth in a mind over matter type of way. Like, "No! I am a new creation in Christ - I am no longer a slave to (insert sin here). Christ has given me the victory, and I am not going back there!" It sounds a bit like a pep rally for yourself, but, to be honest, I think that's what we need! We need to actually believe what the scriptures say about ourselves, and we need to believe it most when we are in the throes of damaging thinking, which cripples our actions as well.
It's going to be hard for me to get into the habit of thinking this way, but I'd like to.
9.21.2008
9.18.2008
Napping Woes
Lexi has never been a good napper. Ever. Even as a newborn, she fought sleeping during the day and chose to cry/scream instead. It was awful.
Nowadays, she is happy during the day, but come the afternoon she refuses to nap. So come the late afternoon/evening, we are both exhausted and she is quite unpleasant. I've tried putting her down right after lunch, with a full tummy, in her crib, and making her stay there for at least 45 minutes. She screams the entire time. I let her scream for 10 days before I decided that wasn't going to work. I've tried shifting nap time earlier and later with no success. I've changed locations to my bed, the floor in her room, the floor in my room, and the floor in the living room, but she thinks that means she can crawl away and go play instead of sleep. The only time I can get her to nap is if she falls asleep in the car and I bring her in the house and lay her down in the living room. If I lay her in her crib she immediately wakes up crying (and usually doesn't go back to sleep).
Napping in the car is interesting. If we drive in the car anytime past 11 AM, she will fall asleep. That tells me she should be able to fall asleep at home anytime past 11 AM. But she refuses.
The really weird thing is she is a GREAT night sleeper. I lay her in her crib wide awake and walk away and usually never hear a peep from her. Yet following the exact same routine for nap time leads only to misery. This is a mystery to me.
Needless to say, I am at my wits end with this napping business. Forcing her to nap/scream in her crib is grinding on the nerves and she never goes to sleep that way. Allowing her to skip a nap altogether makes both of us tired and grouchy by late afternoon and ruins a peaceful bedtime because she usually passes out for a nap around 5 - 6 PM.
Today she has only slept for 10 minutes, so I've been trying to encourage a nap the whole afternoon. No cigar, and the grumpiness is setting in. Feel free to pray :)
Nowadays, she is happy during the day, but come the afternoon she refuses to nap. So come the late afternoon/evening, we are both exhausted and she is quite unpleasant. I've tried putting her down right after lunch, with a full tummy, in her crib, and making her stay there for at least 45 minutes. She screams the entire time. I let her scream for 10 days before I decided that wasn't going to work. I've tried shifting nap time earlier and later with no success. I've changed locations to my bed, the floor in her room, the floor in my room, and the floor in the living room, but she thinks that means she can crawl away and go play instead of sleep. The only time I can get her to nap is if she falls asleep in the car and I bring her in the house and lay her down in the living room. If I lay her in her crib she immediately wakes up crying (and usually doesn't go back to sleep).
Napping in the car is interesting. If we drive in the car anytime past 11 AM, she will fall asleep. That tells me she should be able to fall asleep at home anytime past 11 AM. But she refuses.
The really weird thing is she is a GREAT night sleeper. I lay her in her crib wide awake and walk away and usually never hear a peep from her. Yet following the exact same routine for nap time leads only to misery. This is a mystery to me.
Needless to say, I am at my wits end with this napping business. Forcing her to nap/scream in her crib is grinding on the nerves and she never goes to sleep that way. Allowing her to skip a nap altogether makes both of us tired and grouchy by late afternoon and ruins a peaceful bedtime because she usually passes out for a nap around 5 - 6 PM.
Today she has only slept for 10 minutes, so I've been trying to encourage a nap the whole afternoon. No cigar, and the grumpiness is setting in. Feel free to pray :)
9.13.2008
Story Time
If you need some comic relief, go to your local library and sit in on Story Time for 18-36 month old children. You won't regret it.
Even though Lexi is only 16 months old, my mom took her to Story Time in Collierville for the first time last week. Of course kids this age can't sit still or be quiet for a story, so there was much chatter, crawling, and walking about. After the story, they sang two songs. Lexi thought that was great fun. First, they sang "If You're Happy and You Know It". Lexi learned to clap her hands quickly and continued to clap her hands no matter what the song actually told her to do (i.e., stomp your feet, jump up and down, etc.). Then they taught her "Little Bunny Fufu". Instead of holding 2 fingers up like rabbit ears, Lexi only held up 1 finger, making it hop like a bunny. But the best part by far was "bopping them (the field mice) on the head" because she got to whack herself in the forehead. This is humor at its height for a toddler. Now Lexi walks around the house all day moving her one finger in a hopping motion until I sing the song, and bopping herself in the head. After the songs the kids got to play with toys for a few minutes, and then it was time to leave. On the way out the door, they let Lexi choose a sticker. She pointed to a Sponge Bob sticker, so the lady stuck it to her hand. Lexi immediately shook her head no, and held her hand out to my mom, indicating she wanted the sticker removed. The rest of the day Lexi kept asking where Bob was, although she pronounces it "Bah". We'd show her the sticker, she'd shake her head no and walk away, only to return 20 seconds later asking for Bah. The whole day. I'm not sure why, but Lexi has an aversion to stickers, band aids, tags on blankets or clothes, stray strings on clothes or rugs, scabs, moles, scars...she just doesn't like them. Very strange.
I took Lexi to Story Time in Olive Branch on Friday. We got to choose a snack first thing, Fruit Loops or Cheerios. I got her Fruit Loops because she had never had them. She immediately went to the kiddie rug and sat down Indian style, appearing ready for the reading to begin. I gave her a Fruit Loop; she shook her head no and spit it out. Then she asked for more. She did this about 5 times before I took them away. The little girl next to Lexi had selected Cheerios and accidentally dropped one within Lexi's reach. She grabbed it and stuffed it in her mouth. I took the hint and got Lexi her own bag of reliable Cheerios. As the first story was read, Lexi tried to crawl to all the other kids and offer them Cheerios. Then we all stood up and sang a song about teddy bears. Then we sat down and Lexi squirmed through a second story. When it was finished, the kids all got to color their own teddy bear. Lexi had a bag of about 7 fat crayons. She'd select a color, scribble ever so lightly and ever so quickly on her paper one time, set the crayon down, and select another color. She repeated the process for all 7 crayons. Once they were all out of the bag, she decided to see if she could hold all 7 at the same time in one hand. This experiment took about 5 minutes, but she eventually accomplished the feat. She was very proud of herself. Then the librarian put a sticker on her coloring sheet, which worked out better than her hand. Lexi tried to color the sticker orange and then never gave it a second look. After coloring it was time to leave. I told Lexi it was time to go bye bye, so she turned to the 2 yr old girl next to her, walked right up to her, and held her arms out, just standing there. The other girl's mom said to her daughter, "I think Lexi wants a hug." The other girl just stood there, but Lexi heard "hug", so she hugged the girl. It was very sweet.
This is long.
Even though Lexi is only 16 months old, my mom took her to Story Time in Collierville for the first time last week. Of course kids this age can't sit still or be quiet for a story, so there was much chatter, crawling, and walking about. After the story, they sang two songs. Lexi thought that was great fun. First, they sang "If You're Happy and You Know It". Lexi learned to clap her hands quickly and continued to clap her hands no matter what the song actually told her to do (i.e., stomp your feet, jump up and down, etc.). Then they taught her "Little Bunny Fufu". Instead of holding 2 fingers up like rabbit ears, Lexi only held up 1 finger, making it hop like a bunny. But the best part by far was "bopping them (the field mice) on the head" because she got to whack herself in the forehead. This is humor at its height for a toddler. Now Lexi walks around the house all day moving her one finger in a hopping motion until I sing the song, and bopping herself in the head. After the songs the kids got to play with toys for a few minutes, and then it was time to leave. On the way out the door, they let Lexi choose a sticker. She pointed to a Sponge Bob sticker, so the lady stuck it to her hand. Lexi immediately shook her head no, and held her hand out to my mom, indicating she wanted the sticker removed. The rest of the day Lexi kept asking where Bob was, although she pronounces it "Bah". We'd show her the sticker, she'd shake her head no and walk away, only to return 20 seconds later asking for Bah. The whole day. I'm not sure why, but Lexi has an aversion to stickers, band aids, tags on blankets or clothes, stray strings on clothes or rugs, scabs, moles, scars...she just doesn't like them. Very strange.
I took Lexi to Story Time in Olive Branch on Friday. We got to choose a snack first thing, Fruit Loops or Cheerios. I got her Fruit Loops because she had never had them. She immediately went to the kiddie rug and sat down Indian style, appearing ready for the reading to begin. I gave her a Fruit Loop; she shook her head no and spit it out. Then she asked for more. She did this about 5 times before I took them away. The little girl next to Lexi had selected Cheerios and accidentally dropped one within Lexi's reach. She grabbed it and stuffed it in her mouth. I took the hint and got Lexi her own bag of reliable Cheerios. As the first story was read, Lexi tried to crawl to all the other kids and offer them Cheerios. Then we all stood up and sang a song about teddy bears. Then we sat down and Lexi squirmed through a second story. When it was finished, the kids all got to color their own teddy bear. Lexi had a bag of about 7 fat crayons. She'd select a color, scribble ever so lightly and ever so quickly on her paper one time, set the crayon down, and select another color. She repeated the process for all 7 crayons. Once they were all out of the bag, she decided to see if she could hold all 7 at the same time in one hand. This experiment took about 5 minutes, but she eventually accomplished the feat. She was very proud of herself. Then the librarian put a sticker on her coloring sheet, which worked out better than her hand. Lexi tried to color the sticker orange and then never gave it a second look. After coloring it was time to leave. I told Lexi it was time to go bye bye, so she turned to the 2 yr old girl next to her, walked right up to her, and held her arms out, just standing there. The other girl's mom said to her daughter, "I think Lexi wants a hug." The other girl just stood there, but Lexi heard "hug", so she hugged the girl. It was very sweet.
This is long.
9.04.2008
Delight
One cool thing about being a parent is it gives you the ability to better understand life from God's perspective.
Let me explain.
Most parents of young kids annoy people without kids by constantly telling stories about their kids. I am guilty of this, but no one has had the courage to date to tell me to shut up, that my obsession over Lexi's every breath is only fascinating to me, Elian, and the grandparents. My stories mildly entertain other parents, but only to the degree that they can compare/contrast their child's behaviors to mine.
But why is it that so many of us parents can't stop foaming at the mouth about seemingly insignificant things like waving bye-bye, saying "shoe", and blowing kisses? It's because we are completely infatuated with our kids. And that's where the God perspective comes in. As parents, we are able to experience what it means to delight in our own children. So when we read in the Bible that God delights in us, we get as close as we can this side of heaven to understanding what that really means.
And I don't just delight in the things Lexi does. I delight in merely who she is. She is a beautifully complex creation God used Elian and me to make. She is silly and ambitious and tender. I delight in her when she learns to say a new word (this week it was "up") , when she's sitting quietly, absorbed in her favorite cartoons, and when she sweetly kisses me in the morning to let me know she's awake for the day and she wants to get out of bed.
If my human heart swells this much for my daughter, how much more must God's perfect heart swell for us? And then my mind immediately goes to how unworthy I am to be infintely delighted in by a holy God. But before Satan can have a Field Day with that thought, God reminds me that I am worthy, not because of who I am or what I do, but because I've asked the perfectly worthy Christ to represent me before God.
Let me explain.
Most parents of young kids annoy people without kids by constantly telling stories about their kids. I am guilty of this, but no one has had the courage to date to tell me to shut up, that my obsession over Lexi's every breath is only fascinating to me, Elian, and the grandparents. My stories mildly entertain other parents, but only to the degree that they can compare/contrast their child's behaviors to mine.
But why is it that so many of us parents can't stop foaming at the mouth about seemingly insignificant things like waving bye-bye, saying "shoe", and blowing kisses? It's because we are completely infatuated with our kids. And that's where the God perspective comes in. As parents, we are able to experience what it means to delight in our own children. So when we read in the Bible that God delights in us, we get as close as we can this side of heaven to understanding what that really means.
And I don't just delight in the things Lexi does. I delight in merely who she is. She is a beautifully complex creation God used Elian and me to make. She is silly and ambitious and tender. I delight in her when she learns to say a new word (this week it was "up") , when she's sitting quietly, absorbed in her favorite cartoons, and when she sweetly kisses me in the morning to let me know she's awake for the day and she wants to get out of bed.
If my human heart swells this much for my daughter, how much more must God's perfect heart swell for us? And then my mind immediately goes to how unworthy I am to be infintely delighted in by a holy God. But before Satan can have a Field Day with that thought, God reminds me that I am worthy, not because of who I am or what I do, but because I've asked the perfectly worthy Christ to represent me before God.
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